Shop Orchid Care OrchidTalk Orchid Forum Weather Station Links Nursery

Welcome to OrchidTalk Orchid Forums


The Friendliest Orchid Community on the Internet!


  •  » Learn to Repot your Orchids
  •  » Learn Orchid Care Tips and Secrets
  •  » Find the perfect Orchid for your Growing Environment
  •  » Chat with Orchid Growing Professionals

OrchidTalk - "Bringing People Together to Grow Orchids Better!"


Let us help you grow your Orchids better; Join our community today.


YES! I want to register an account for free right now!


Register or Login now to remove this advertisement.

Results 1 to 8 of 8

Just for a laugh

This is a discussion on Just for a laugh within the The Outback Terrace Bar forums, part of the Land Plants category; One year, a husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas ...

Click here to increase the font size Click here to reduce the font size
  1. #1
    Roy's Avatar
    Roy
    Roy is online now Senior Member
    Real Name
    Roy Lee
    My Grow Area
    Greenhouse
    Favorite Orchid(s)
    Cattleya, Ascda, Vanda, Paphs.
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Victoria, Australia
    Posts
    2,670
    Member's Country Flag

    Default Just for a laugh

    One year, a husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift.

    The next year, he didn't buy her a gift.

    When she asked him why, he replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"

    And that's how the fight started...

    ************************************************** **********************

    My wife walked into the den and asked "What's on the TV?"

    I replied "Dust".

    And that's how the fight started...

    ************************************************** ********************** 0A

    A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.

    She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible.

    I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'

    The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.'

    And that's how the fight started...

    ************************************************** **********************

    My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.

    She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3 seconds.

    I bought her a scale.

    And that's how the fight started...

    ************************************************** **********************

    I asked my wife, 'Where do you want to go for our anniversary ?'

    It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.

    'Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!' she said.

    So I suggested, 'How about the kitchen?'

    And that's when the fight started...

    ************************************************** **********************

    My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed..

    I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have sex?'

    'No,' she answered.

    I then said, 'Is that your final answer?'

    She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying 'Yes.'

    So I said, 'Then I'd like to phone a friend.'

    And that's when the fight started...

    *********** ************************************************** ***********

    I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95.

    Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95.

    I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream.

    And that's when the fight started...

    ************************************************** **********************

    I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.

    'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.'

    He said, 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?'

    'Nah, she can order for herself.'

    And that's when the fight started...

  2. #2
    Brutal_Dreamer's Avatar
    Brutal_Dreamer is offline Dreaming with my eyes open...
    Real Name
    Bruce Brown
    My Grow Area
    Greenhouse
    Favorite Orchid(s)
    Cattleyas & Slippers
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Gender
    Male
    Location
    Arkansas
    Posts
    34,003
    Member's Country Flag

    Default

    Hahahehehahahehe.... too much. Thanks for the laughs..

    Cheers,
    BD

  3. #3
    ischel1's Avatar
    ischel1 is offline Senior Member
    Real Name
    Mary
    My Grow Area
    Greenhouse
    Favorite Orchid(s)
    Cattleya William Farrell
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Gulf Coast
    Posts
    3,141
    Member's Country Flag

    Default

    Oh I needed this. Soooooooooo funny. Thanks

  4. #4
    Cjcorner's Avatar
    Cjcorner is offline Senior Member
    Real Name
    Connie
    My Grow Area
    Porch/Patio.
    Favorite Orchid(s)
    Mini Vanda, Schombs &Encyclia.
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    West of Tampa, FL
    Posts
    9,139
    Member's Country Flag

    Default

    Too funny! Absolutely a riot...even the husband laughed.
    Connie

  5. #5
    Molly Taco's Avatar
    Molly Taco is offline Re-member WHAT ??
    Real Name
    Cin
    Favorite Orchid(s)
    Catts
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    SW FL
    Posts
    4,740
    Member's Country Flag

    Default

    I didn't know that they were taping conversations at my house LOL !!!
    Cin

  6. #6
    bench72's Avatar
    bench72 is offline Moderator
    Real Name
    Tim
    My Grow Area
    Porch/Patio.
    Favorite Orchid(s)
    Paphiopedilums
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Sydney, Australia
    Posts
    5,480
    Member's Country Flag

    Default

    good one roy!!! chuckling away here!

  7. #7
    Tmai's Avatar
    Tmai is offline Ya'll are funnin' me!
    Real Name
    Tami
    My Grow Area
    Porch/Patio.
    Favorite Orchid(s)
    Catts and Vandas
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    Pensacola, FL
    Posts
    3,096
    Member's Country Flag

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Molly Taco View Post
    I didn't know that they were taping conversations at my house LOL !!!
    Cin
    Bwwwwaahhhaaahahahahhahahahaha

    Thanks for the jokes, Roy! A good laugh on Monday is ALWAYS welcome.

  8. #8
    Phyrex's Avatar
    Phyrex is offline .CA-member-t
    Real Name
    Richard
    My Grow Area
    Windowsill
    Favorite Orchid(s)
    Phals, Oncs, Neos, Paphs
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Vancouver, Canada
    Posts
    1,600
    Member's Country Flag

    Default

    Thanks Roy. I didn't have too much to do at work. This sure helped me out

Similar Threads

  1. Just for a laugh
    By Roy in forum The Outback Terrace Bar
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: September 13th, 2009, 01:55 PM
  2. A laugh for you
    By Gin in forum The Outback Terrace Bar
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: October 18th, 2006, 02:20 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
OrchidTalk --An Orchid Growers Discussion Forum brought to you by River Valley Orchidworks. A World Community where orchid beginners and experts talk about orchids and share tips on their care, cultivation, and propagation.