Funny Product Reviews!

**kiwiorchids** · January 17th, 2013, 06:16 AM

So, I got bored!

I was just browsing a couple of mail order sites this evening, and stumbled upon some INCREDIBLY funny product reviews!

Some of them were a little....dodgy, but boy, they were funny!

So I will share some with you guys today, with the product and the review and the number of stars!

Feel free to share any that you find as well, sometimes some people....well, some just want to watch the world pee its pants lol

Best served after a hard day at work or in the garden

**kiwiorchids** · January 17th, 2013, 06:22 AM

The Official Bulls**t Button (BS Button)

By A. Rosenberg

I bought one of these about three months ago for use with the missus. I got tired of hearing all of her complaints, such as I haven't increased her household allowance since 1978 and I keep coming home smelling of cheap perfume. This button has really kept her shut up!

This morning, I was served with divorce papers. You know what I think about that? BULLSH....

**kiwiorchids** · January 17th, 2013, 06:24 AM

Uranium Ore

By George Bungle
5 stars

I used to have terrible flatulence. One time we were visiting my wife's parents, and I risked a three but delivered a nine. I'll never forget the look on my wife's face, as an eggy smog engulfed her loved ones in a bubbling foam of concentrated misery. For a while no-one said anything. We just sat there in total disbelieving silence, as the cooling gasses began to condense on our wine glasses, and twinkled in the candlelight; a tableau vivant of burnt hair and melting wool.

But then I discovered Uranium Ore, and all my gastric nightmares were solved. Now, whenever I need to let one go, I don't have to worry about a thing. I simply distend the old dinner snipper, and clap like a stadium full of trained seals begging for fish heads -- instantly destroying all life within a 15,000 mile radius. No embarrassing smells, no fuss, just one massively disproportionate final solution to all socially awkward situations.

I used to spend a fortune on assassins and trousers, just so I could leave the house during the day. But now I can go to the movies, go skydiving, ride the tube at rush hour, and blot out the sun whenever I feel the need to save face, and avoid expensive laundry bills. It's so convenient and easy to use, even a brainwashed child could do it any moment now!

So don't hesitate. Buy with confidence! And the next time you need to squeeze cheese say hello to Uranium Ore, and goodbye to everyone you know!

**kiwiorchids** · January 17th, 2013, 06:25 AM

Uranium Ore

By Kyle J. Von Bose
5 Stars

I bought this to power a home-made submarine that I use to look for prehistoric-era life forms in land-locked lakes around my home town in Alaska. At first I wasn't sure if this item would (or could) arrive via mail, but I was glad to see it showed up with no problems. Well, almost no problems.

Unfortuantly my mom opened my mail, because she does not respect people's privacy. She was pretty upset to see Uranium Ore. After a long argument and me running away from home again, she finaly stopped being such an idiot and I was able to get back to work.

The quality of this Uranium is on par with the stuff I was bying from the Libyans over at the mall parking lot, but at half the price! I just hope the seller does not run out, because I have many projects on my list including a night vision sasquatch radar, an electromagnetic chupakabra cage, a high velocity, aerial, weighted Mothman net and super heated, instant grill cheese sandwhich maker.